It's amazing how different life is these days. We've traded in really late nights for really early mornings. We eat cold meals most of the time. Our living room has been taken over by bouncing balls and giant foam alphabet puzzles. A pick up and go has been replaced with a 3 week plan ahead. 2 loads of laundry has turned into 3 or 4. Our grocery list has added things like diapers and mini forks and spoons. The last book I read was "No Biting". The bathtub is littered with turtles and squirty crabs. My fall decorating has been quite scaled down (and put up high, I might add).
And the truth of it is, I wouldn't trade it for anything. As hectic as our life gets, it's just that, our life now. We are parents first, spouses second and Jamie and Gabe last. Don't get me wrong, life isn't perfect. For example, one of the last times we went out to dinner, Ethan decided that he wanted nothing to do with sitting in a high chair, despite my desperate plea. Even after putting him on my lap he went into limp fish mode and was trying to slide under the table. We went outside and had a talk (and if I remember the conversation correctly, it went something like this:
Mommy: "Ethan, you need to have a better attitude"
Mommy: "No, Ethan, there's no dog. Okay wait, yes there is a dog in that car, but we're being a little cranky and you need to behave"
Mommy: "Ethan, we don't eat Mommy's shirt"
Awesome. Sweet talk. I'm pretty sure I didn't even finish the dinner I ordered that night.
Then we have our evenings between 5:30 and 6:30 p.m. most nights. We call this "that time" of the evening. The time when our sweet, blond haired, blue-eyed angel turns into a shell of himself. He's cranky, doesn't want to be held, but doesn't want to be put down....it's special.
Then we have the mornings where Ethan equates having his diaper changed to having his arm ripped off. At least that's what you'd think was going on if you heard him crying. It's a really fantastic start to a morning.
BUT, then we have the moments when I sneak in Ethan's room to put away laundry early in the morning and I realize that he's popped his little head up and he's waiving at me through his crib, like this morning.
You have the moments when Ethan always calls for the other one of us that's not with him. If just I am dropping him off at daycare, we'll get out of the car and Ethan will say "Daddy?", in the sweetest voice, because he's so used to us both dropping him off.
You have the moments when he says "MMMMMM AAAAAAA" whenever he gives you a kiss.
You have the moments where he smells a lemon or a lime with a sniff......followed by a blowing of his noise...because he doesn't quite understand that sniffing something only goes one way....in not out!
He's a character and he's a sweetheart and, just like Gabe and I do, he has his moments. When I feel like I'm losing control and I feel like my child is a nightmare, I remind myself that adults have "off" days, so why can't toddlers. And once I climb over that sense of panic that I'm going to have a bad child I realize that this is my life. This is our life. It's hurdling the struggles to get to all the good "stuff".
And life, well it's about to get even more interesting.....to be continued.